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Quiz on Parenting Style: What Type Of Parent Are You?

Being a mother is one of the most difficult jobs we will ever have, and at the same time, one of the most important. When we become a parent, our main concern is the education of our children and our desire to instill in them strong principles and values, so they will know how to deal with the constant challenges that life presents.

By learning to communicate effectively with our children, we strengthen our family's values and relationships. At the same time, we increase our children's opportunities for success when they have to deal with life as adults.

We hope after reading this information, you will feel better able to talk with your children. In your job as parents, you should express what you feel and think, as you strive to establish an ongoing dialog within your family. Furthermore, we hope to improve your ability to listen to what your children tell you.

By increasing the frequency, warmth, and quality of conversations between parents and their children, we strengthen families and encourage mutual respect. Children in these families can identify their own values, and benefit from the love with which they are being raised.


This is not a test. Instead, we invite you to think about how we all react to everyday situations. Each situation has three possible answers (a, b, or c). This questionnaire is designed to help us think about what kind of parents we are. At the end of the questionnaire, you will find a key to help evaluate the results.

When my child brings me his/her report card with a low grade and tries to explain why, I:

Think itís only about one bad grade in a specific subject, and I donít consider it very important. Express my dissatisfaction with the bad grade, but I praise him/her for the good ones. Focus on the bad grade and get angry with him/her because he/she failed.

When my child explains why he/she missed his/her curfew and came home late, I:

a. Ignore what he/she is starting to tell me, and think about how Iím going to punish him/her.
b. Accept his/her explanation without questioning or punishing him/her.
c. Listen to his/her reasons, but let him/her know why his/her conduct was wrong.

If Iím shopping with my child, and he/she cries because I wonít buy a toy he/she wants, I:

a. Talk to him/her to get him/her to stop crying, and if I can, let him/her choose a toy.
b. Get in a bad mood, demand that he/she stop crying, and try to correct the bad behavior.
c. Buy the toy without thinking about it.

When my child doesnít want to go to school, I:

a. Ignore his/her reasons and make him/her go.
b. Listen to his/her reasons and let him/her stay home.
c. Discuss his/her reasons for not going, and I try to help him/her solve the problem.

When I hear my child saying negative things about him/herself, I:

a. Pay attention to what he says and show interest in his/her feelings.
b. Think itís not worth paying attention to such foolishness.
c. Let him/her talk, but I donít worry about it, because I think this is normal for someone that age.

If my child is suspended from school for fighting with a classmate, I:

a. Donít say or do anything; I think itís something kids do.
b. Suggest that all the parents meet with the school administrators to discuss the incident and to try to prevent this type of behavior from happening again.
c. Punish my child for fighting, without listening to any explanation.

When my child has to complete a homework assignment, I:

a. Sit next to him/her, organize his materials, and help him/her complete it.
b. Let him/her organize his supplies himself/herself, and I help him/her solve the problems.
c. Leave him/her alone to do his/her homework and keep an eye on him/her to make sure he/she is working.

If my child tells me that he/she wants to drink alcohol, I:

a. Get angry and scold him/her for saying such a thing.
b. Am amused by his/her comment and I donít pay much attention to him/her.
c. Take advantage of the opportunity to talk to him/her about drinking alcohol.

If my child wants to go outside and play until late on a school night, I:

a. Let him know a reasonable hour to come home and I ask him to comply.
b. Tell him absolutely not, without explaining anything.
c. Let him go out.

If I find out that my childís friends are starting to smoke cigarettes or drink alcohol, I:

a. Let my child know that itís o.k. to get together with those friends, as long as he/she never smokes or drinks.
b. Express my disapproval, but I let him/her decide if he/she wants to continue seeing those friends.
c. Prohibit him/her from keeping up these friendships.

Instructions for obtaining your score:

Write the corresponding number for each one of your answers. Add your points to get your score.
  1. a = 0
  2. a = 10
  3. a = 5
  4. a = 10
  5. a = 5
  6. a = 0
  7. a = 0
  8. a = 10
  9. a = 5
  10. a = 0

b = 5
b = 0
b = 10
b = 0
b = 10
b = 5
b = 5
b = 0
b = 10
b = 5

c = 10
c = 5
c = 0
c = 5
c = 0
c = 10
c = 10
c = 5
c = 0
c = 10


If your score falls between:

0-32 points: Permissive Style
33-66 points: Balanced Style
67-100 points: Authoritarian Style

From 0 to 32 points: Permissive Parents This type of parent generally wants to control his/her childrenís behavior, but at the same time, is afraid of losing his/her childrenís love. When children realize their parents have this fear, they resist authority through manipulation.

A permissive attitude has the following consequences: children with low self-esteem, who lack confidence in themselves, are dependent, immature, and unable to make decisions.

From 33 to 66 points: Balanced Parents
You believe in and trust your children. You have succeeded in establishing respect among family members. As a result, your children will become confident young people with high self-esteem, a good sense of responsibility, and an ability to make their own decisions.

From 67 to 100 points: Authoritarian Parents
Overly demanding, you try to control your children by threatening them. You tend to exert your authority to make them do things through a system of ďreward and punishment.Ē Generally these parents never believe that their children will be successful. With attitudes and methods like these, children will most likely rebel and parents will lose control over them. Besides, young people will suffer the following negative consequences: low self-esteem, immaturity, little confidence in themselves, and a lack of independence.

Sources - U.S. Dept. of Health and Human Services

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